Catholic Exchange

A Lot of Homeschool Kids are Wonderful

Today, I learned another perk to being a homeschooling mother: no time to waste watching daytime television like “The View.”  I smiled with amusement tonight when I heard that Joy Behar said on air, “a lot of them are demented when they’re homeschooled.”  

How I would love the homeschooled high school teens I’ve seen in recent weeks respond to Joy, a former schoolteacher.  The contrast between them and Joy would be immediately evident; the teens have manners and don’t interrupt people when they talk.  They are thoughtful, logical, and base their arguments on facts instead of bias.

In the last two weeks, I’ve seen countless instances of homeschooled families that work.  This morning, I saw a homeschool family whose father was off shift swimming at a local Y.  Their P.E. for the day was the whole family, from the preschooler to the school kids, playing in a pool with both their parents.  This afternoon, when we got our first snow of the season, my own kids dashed outside with their dad to savor the wonder of melting snow before Thanksgiving.

If we’re known by our fruits, I know lots of homeschool champions.  Some are seniors, many of whom are in dual enrollment with college classes and doing well.  There’s the senior boy who volunteers for inner city missions ½ day a week — while juggling a tough curriculum with advanced math and science plus college math this term.  There’s the senior girl juggling her senior year, college classes, and sitting when needed for a friend’s 98-year-old grandfather.  There’s the senior boy who makes time from his classes and scholarship applications to teach 2 middle school boys how to get started with HTML programming — before he heads to an aerospace program with the Civil Air Patrol.  Then there’s the high school junior I recently observed taking his 6 younger siblings to a church program — and managing all of them, with the help of his teen sisters.  He did a better job than some parents I’ve seen, and his younger siblings all knew how to behave.  Their parents taught them well.

All of these kids have worked hard, as have their parents, to ensure they are well educated. 

Unlike Behar’s fishwife shriek that they are scared of other children and are only exposed to mom and dad, these youths are engaged with their parents, siblings, friends, churches, and the community at large.  Studies show 88% of homeschool graduates are involved in civic organizations, as opposed to 50% of the general public.

My kids are now middle school and high school students, and my role has evolved from primary instructor to facilitator/mentor.  The biggest challenge most of the homeschooled families I know face is how to limit or moderate our outside activities so we have enough time to master academics too.

Besides church, my kids are in group swim classes, a homeschool co-op, a professional children’s choir, and multiple civic organizations.  My 14-year-old daughter, trained at the state level through 4-H in recreation leadership, served as a camp counselor trainee last summer.  This week, I watched her lead recreation for 20 kids, with total ease.  At the ages of 12 and 13, she went by herself to workshops at Purdue and sang with the state 4-H choir at our State Fair last summer. 

My 12-year-old son is currently learning web design so he can work with a team of kids to update web pages for not-for-profits for community service.  He’s competed on robotics teams that have won area contests.  I would pit his invented barbecue sauces he’s entered in contests against any adult chef, any time.  The last 2 years, the pumpkins from his garden have won awards for being among the best in our state.

Those activities are the gravy on their academic meat and potatoes, which take the bulk of their time and mental energy.  I am a product of public schools, as is my husband.  We both know our children’s curriculum assignments are more challenging than those we faced at their ages.  Their curricula meets them where they are — ahead in some areas, a little slower in others.  If a concept isn’t mastered, we work on it until it is and may reinvent how we approach it.

Does that mean homeschooled kids are perfect?  Of course not.  It means that, contrary to Ms. Behar’s assertion, that they are not “demented.”  Let her shriek and howl insults.  I’m too busy teaching my children to care.

Both are engaged with kids from a variety of home environments, faith traditions, and education experiences: home, public, parochial, private secular, and charter schools.  I know and love kids from all those different environments.

And I pray that my love and respect for those kids from many backgrounds will teach my children something Joy Behar never learned.  Generalizations that disparage groups are inaccurate and wrong.  I could call them an uninformed, narrow, uneducated “View.”

In my home, we call them prejudice.

Comments

12 responses to “A Lot of Homeschool Kids are Wonderful”

  1. Cooky642 Avatar
    Cooky642

    WOW!!! Spot on, Mary! Too bad Ms. Behar will never see it…..she might LEARN something!

  2. elkabrikir Avatar
    elkabrikir

    Of my 11 children, all the school aged ones have been homeschooled for some part or all of their schooling career.

    Here are some vignets of our family life over a 12 hour period this weekend: 4 kids gathered around the computer. The 12 year old stroking her sister’s back. Their 6ft 3inch 16 year old brother, and 14 year old sister hunched over their college aged sister who was showing them something on her facebook.

    Next, the 10 year old making a power point of his 4 year old brother’s life and antics. The 16 year old comes in and helps out, in good cheer and voluntarily, of course.

    5 kids and dad settle down to watch VaTech beat UVA while 3 “little ones” pounce over the fans and each other. A gentle shove to move the obstruction head out of the line of vision adds to the action packed sporting event.

    The 12 year old sister helping her 3 younger siblings make a one year birthday card for the baby. The 14 year old makes the crown! From the two Clemson students to the 2 year old everybody gushes over the baby and prods her to plunge her full fist into her homemade, by her sister, birthday cake.

    Finally, and sadly because the college girls have gone back to school, 9 kids and Mom and Dad gather around the table for a simple dinner of leftovers. We pray the advent wreath blessing (from Magnificat) over the wreath, and sing “O come, Emanuel….” for the gazillionth year in a row. Somebody shouts, “Come, Lord Jesus!” And we all reply “come quickly!” while 3 kids race to turn on the overhead light!

    The above is the fruit of homeschooling. And, as a matter of fact, just yesterday, while watching those scenes of my children interacting, I began singing, “And you’ll know they are Christians by their love, by their love, and you’ll know they are Christians by their love.”

    The only way to become one of spirit is to be one, which takes time and close proximity. Homeschooling nurtures both.

  3. elkabrikir Avatar
    elkabrikir

    PS Ms Behar needs to live up to her name, Joy!

    My baby’s middle name is Joy because she was born Nov 30th and anticipates the Christmas Joy. Also, bearing and raising has been 100% JOY, in the purest Christian meaning.

    Joy to the World the Lord is Come, let earth receive her (servant, savior) King!!!

  4. Peter M. Calabrese Avatar

    Another line of hate speech from the View.

  5. thetucks Avatar
    thetucks

    Sounds like Ms. Behar could use today’s homily from Catholic Exchange:

    Homily of the Day
    No Strangers, Only Brothers and Sisters

    December 1st, 2008 by Monsignor Dennis Clark, Ph.D.
    Is 2:1-5 / Mt 8:5-11

    With each passing year, we find ourselves confronted with abundant new evidence of our human inclination to fragment into in-groups and out-groups. Whether on the international scale or in our own neighborhoods, schools, and parishes, we see it happening over and over, one group declaring another to be outsiders, strangers, inferiors, not one of us. The division is always arbitrary and usually quite superficial in origin, but that doesn’t lessen the intensity with which it is felt and enforced, sometimes even with threats of death.

    Nothing could be further from the big family, the communion, which our hearts yearn for. Isaiah tells us in today’s Old Testament reading that God has a very different vision of our future. “The mountain of the Lord’s house shall be established as the highest mountain and … all nations shall stream toward it.” In God’s vision, there is no they, only we, no strangers, only brothers and sisters.

    So how are we doing at making God’s plan come true? Are we leaving anyone or any group outside the circle of our love and concern? Isn’t it time to bring everyone inside?

  6. DMilavickas Avatar
    DMilavickas

    I’m sorry for being uncharitable, but having seen Ms. Behar a number of times, I can only come to one conclusion….

    Ms. Behar is a useful idiot. That lack of common sense in her is astounding!

  7. Claire Avatar
    Claire

    Consider the source: The View has been notorious for its loud-mouth ignorant, anti-Catholic/Christian accusations for years now. I don’t give a second thought to any of their sound-bytes.

  8. DonnaMaria Avatar
    DonnaMaria

    Thank you, Mary. As a homeschooling mother of four, I appreciate you enlightening those prejudiced against families who choose to educate their children at home. We could always send it to The View… who knows?

  9. DonnaMaria Avatar
    DonnaMaria

    One thing we can do (and I just did) was write to ABC and complain. I took the liberty to take some of the things that Mary wrote. I also thanked them for Elisabeth Hasselbeck–she needs support, as the only conservative person there! They do pay attention if they get a lot of complaints, and I know that homeschooling families can be great at making themselves heard!

  10. Warren Jewell Avatar
    Warren Jewell

    That’s funny, but I always thought that the View supports a team of use-LESS idiots. Even Ms. Hasselbeck can afford to find a real, use-FUL job elsewhere.

    Indeed, all of television is so useless to me – wastes of time, intellect, moral strength, funds and electricity – I refuse to own a television, and never have.

    And, I have this secret desire to invite myself into homeschooling families, and find so much more to learn.

  11. Cooky642 Avatar
    Cooky642

    Warren, dear, see if you can “adopt” one! They will learn from you (all those years spent reading literature) as much as you will learn from them! Great idea for a “self”-Christmas gift!

    Did anyone besides me notice the juxtaposition of Elkabriker’s post and Msgr. Clark’s homily? How interesting of the Holy Spirit!

  12. elkabrikir Avatar
    elkabrikir

    Cooky,

    thanks for suggesting to Mr Jewell that he “adopt” a homeschooling family. If he’s anywhere near me, I’d welcome him as a grandfather. My kids only have one grandfather and he’s not Catholic. Soooo, contact Mary and start enjoying love and chocolate chip cookies….(actually pizzelle are in the cookie jar now)

    Their is only One Spirit and it lives in each of us regardless of our proximity to one and other.

    Advent blessings to you all.

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