I was at ground zero this morning, praying the rosary with four of my children on the sidewalk outside the abortion clinic. Since our diocese’s parishes are participating in 40 Days for Life, there was a large contingent there—about 30 people. I arrived early and as people began to gather I made a comment. “I don’t think that we should have the ‘Abortion Kills Children’ signs here at the parking lot entrance. We need to minister to women in crisis and I think the signs will alienate them. The signs would be better out at the street.”
The priest who was present responded with hostility and a raised voice, “Women need to know the truth!”
I tried to explain, “Father, studies indicate that by the time women reach the clinic, the baby is not a consideration. If we want to save a baby today, we need to minister to women in crisis.”
“We didn’t come here to argue!” He raised his voice again and then ignored me.
Under the priest’s direction, the parking lot entrance was crowded with people, many holding the indicting signs and others holding enlarged photos of aborted babies. I can’t imagine that any woman approached them for sidewalk counseling. I stood around the corner with my children, prayed a rosary and then left. I don’t want to be associated with that mindset.
Pope John Paul II wrote extensively on these issues. In 1996 when speaking to participants at a pro-life seminar, he made the point clear: “What is needed is the courage to speak the truth clearly, candidly and boldly, but never with hatred or disrespect for persons” (“To Participants in a Pro-life Seminar,” L’Oservatore Romano, 10 March, 1996, 12).
How do we speak hard truths at the abortion clinic without conveying hatred or disrespect toward the clients? First, we have to understand what brings a woman to the clinic. The prominent reasons are fear, desperation, coercion and force by partners or other family members. Women who have scheduled an abortion overwhelmingly feel that they have no other options. They must choose between their livelihoods, educations, careers, loved ones, sources of income, etc. and their children. It’s an excruciating conflict.
Second, in ministering to women in crisis, we have to discern how to speak to them so that they feel safe, accepted and supported. The Silent No More campaign, which is comprised of women who have survived having abortions, is a leader in providing guidance on this issue. I have one of their signs: “Pregnant women need support, not abortion.” Feminists for Life, whose philosophy is that no woman who has the resources and support she needs will choose abortion, is also spearheading building a Culture of Life.
Imagine if women arrived at the clinic to face a gathering of people with signs saying, “We are here for you.” “We can help.” “Parenthood: You can!” “Woman, you are good and your needs matter.” It would revolutionize the movement.
Graphic and indicting signs effectively influence public opinion and are useful; however, at the clinic as women are arriving for consultation or abortions, we need re-evaluate the strategy. We’re there to save babies more than make a statement. It’s essential that we have our priorities in order.
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