Catholic Exchange

How Not to Raise a Barbarian

Two hundred years ago, philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau advanced a theory that humans are born naturally good, but corrupted by society.

I thought of Rousseau's theory recently. A colleague told me she left her two pre-teen sons at home alone while she went shopping. Returning an hour later, she found a number of odd marks on the walls. It turned out that her sons, in the midst of a fight, had begun throwing kitchen knives at each other. Fortunately, they were bad shots, but that's scary.

There is no way you could convince this mom that children are born good. Would that all parents had such wisdom. As Christian dad Tony Woodlief writes in the Wall Street Journal, "Some mothers and fathers stubbornly cling to the utopian beliefs of their childless years" — even as their own kids give them plenty of reason to change their minds.

Woodlief — as the father of four boys — has plenty of firsthand evidence that kids are born as sinners. As he puts it, "Nobody who's stood between a toddler and the last cookie should still harbor a belief in the inherent virtue of mankind. And an afternoon at the playground," he declares, "is apt to make one toss out the idealist Rousseau" — that man is a compassionate and sensible being — in favor of the more realistic view and the Christian understanding of the Fall.

Woodlief cites Thomas Sowell, who wrote in his book A Conflict of Visions: "Each new generation born is, in effect, an invasion of civilization by little barbarians, who must be civilized before it is too late."

Sowell offers a contrast between two visions fighting for dominance: the "unconstrained vision" of utopians, who believe they can radically improve mankind, and the "constrained vision" of realists — people who know that man is inherently selfish and cannot be reshaped by government into a better brand of human. Government should instead protect institutions like families "that channel our inherent selfishness into productive behavior," so says Woodlief.

Woodlief is right on. As Aristotle argued, character cannot be taught, it can only be learned — and it is best learned in the communities of the family and the Church, where children can see and experience virtue. That is why the war that is being waged against the family is so serious. If we end up destroying the family unit, we will end up destroying civilization itself. In my 31 years at Prison Fellowship, I have seen firsthand the fruits of broken families — prisons filled with young men and women who had no father, no family. They are like feral children without a knowledge of right and wrong.

We have also seen in our InnerChange Freedom Initiative what healthy community can mean: There, prisoners bond together as family. They are embraced by local churches, and they are part of a community in which virtue is experienced and practiced. That is why the men who graduate from the program have dramatically reduced recidivism rates.

Well, what can we do to keep the little barbarians from becoming big ones? Pray for, promote, and protect the family! And look around your church: See whether the single parents are getting the support and help they deserve. There are so many dysfunctional families today that our church communities have to act as the family writ large — where virtue and Christian character can be touched, tasted, and learned.

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    Setting limits and being their parent instead of their friend is another important step.

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    Reading this article makes me think of how God works through the Church to give "them their food in due season".  Long ago now, good and generous Pope Paul VI published "Humanae Vitae" discussing the all important issues surrounding the transmission of life to the new generation, issues that again in this generation were to become the focal point in creating a world driven by a culture of life or of death, in which he called for theologians to revisit the mode of teaching of these issues in the Church, to make an approach that, consist with the Church's earliest teachings and latest developments of that teaching (the valid method for renewal from Vatican II), would faithfully convey the truth, beauty, and importance of this teaching in a modern (read not so much as relevant as understandable), impactful and personal way for this generation, the post World War II generations, to act on correctly. He recognized that the Natural Law definitions were too rationally succinct to face the emotional challenges of this age, which he rightly diagnosed as one of militant atheism, to win the war of the senses, the sense of beauty, the sense of truth, the sense of love, which the Adversary was beginning to assault with all his force, and that the hope of future generations was at stake in an immediate fashion.  Science had been unleashed, making possible a rational disconnect from moral reality, the only locus of creative progress in the universe, and raising the spectre of a world becoming incapable of responding to life's challenges with sacrificial love, or finally, of finding its way back to rational self-giving and understanding obedience through the social structures of obstruction and intimidation.  He went so far as to predict that, "We are approaching a time when it will take a man of Faith to speak common sense to the world." 

       I suppose it says something about the state of Faith in the world ravaged by war and its memory that so few responded to his call, and those not from the prosperous and free West, but from the East, where suffering had continued so accutely as to eclipse all human hope.  But, and this gets me back to my original point, to those who had such a "care for souls" motivating their search that they dared approach it with confidence in both God and Man, God provided an organic growth of insight, to arrest these vital gifts expressing the truth about man from the perverse clutches of a world proceeding madly.  In the writings and teachings of John Paul II, John Kippley in the USA, Joseph Ratzinger, Scott and Kimberly Hahn and others, who worked to bring the insightful teachings to others, a new unfolding of the beauty of personal integrity in human love, of the iconic and normative presence of the Trinity in the relational covenant of the family, of a unitive and bonding self-giving at the essence of man, has been revealed, upon which can be built, through a real healing of the human psyche and family, a new world culture of life, strongly based on and expressing the elements of truth, natural and divine. 

        My enthusiasm has exceeded my simple purpose at this point, which was to say, that God puts in motion the answers to each generation's crisis through the saintly work of His People, and that these answers are not to be minimized, a particular characteristic of the modern world.  And we can see the fruits of these labors flowing everywhere in His Church, among those who are of Goodwill, receiving and responding to this renewing grace of the moment, as those insights are proven out in the every day needs confronting those working in His vineyard.  The heresies of the world become the workplace of the People of God, and markers of the work that needs doing.  St Bernadette found her stream of healing by digging in the good earth of a refuse heap.  Humble confidence in both God and man is needed to find the current work of the Master.  So God bless the Mother Teresas and the Chuck Colsons of today's world.  In responding to His Grace, and by working along side Him, may we find ourselves in greater union soon. 

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